How to Develop Charisma
The text below is taken from the Wikipedia page on “charisma”:
The following are Professor Wiseman’s general tips on how to be more charismatic:
• General: Open body posture, hands away from face when talking, stand up straight, relax, hands apart with palms forwards or upwards;
• To an individual: Let people know they matter and you enjoy being around them, develop a genuine smile, nod when they talk, briefly touch them on the upper arm, and maintain eye contact;
• To a group: Be comfortable as leader, move around to appear enthusiastic, lean slightly forward and look at all parts of the group;
• Message: Move beyond status quo and make a difference, be controversial, new, simple to understand, counter-intuitive;
• Speech: Be clear, fluent, forceful and articulate, evoke imagery, use an upbeat tempo, occasionally slow for tension or emphasis;
These are the kind of tips you can expect from the current books on improving your charisma. As you can see for yourself, what the researcher Richard Wiseman did, was to take the external aspects of charisma and distill it into a set of behaviors that if followed will make anyone charismatic.
Can you spot the mistake in this?
That’s right, just like most books on “charisma” development, it only focus on the EXTERNAL aspects but as we’ve seen, charisma is a “spiritual quality”, a “personal quality”, something that you radiate from the INSIDE; so how can you be charismatic if you only focus on the external cues?
“Fake it till you make it” doesn’t apply here since charisma radiates from the INSIDE to the OUTSIDE, not the other way around. You can fake a lot of things… but not charisma.
Then how can we develop charisma?
In our school charisma is much more than just “standing out”; it’s a LIFE SYSTEM that has standing out from the crowd as a side effect. That means that not only will you develop that “personal quality” but you’ll also create a better way of living in all levels of your development as a human.
You need to consider this personal evolution as essential for being charismatic.
If a personal evolution is not a part of charisma, you’ll only end up with an unbalanced life. Charisma will only inebriate you with an illusion of a true spiritual power making you prone to depressions and/or self-destructive behavior when you confront your underdeveloped self.
When you achieve this great power of your personality, other parts of you MUST evolve as well to allow your whole being to grow and become a balanced individual.
We divide the parts necessary for developing charisma in four distinct Pillars: Inner Power, Will, Energy and Projection.
Our school explains charisma as a holistic system, so it cannot be explained by any of the parts alone, only by the whole. We understand charisma as the sum of all Four Pillars, be it that neither of them can work alone.
Here’s a graphical representation for better understanding:
1) The First Pillar is called “Inner Power” and its goal is to integrate the mind, body and spirit into a functional whole and develop that “spiritual quality” inside of you. In our materialistic society we often leave a lot of past scars unhealed; these scars are marks in our spirit that (sometimes only on a subconscious and/or energetic level) creates a lot of barriers in ourselves. When you are full of these blocks, your charisma will suffer.
Remember, no bad emotion should stay with you as a charismatic person. Fear must be faced, as well as other negative emotions. It’s this Pillar that can develop your self-confidence, assertiveness and self-esteem.
It’s on this Pillar that you’ll also develop your own spiritual energy.
By integrating all mind, body and spirit, the goal is to become an authentic person faithful to your own principles.
2) The Second Pillar is called “Will”. If I could say one thing that is missing one most men out there this would be the one. In short, the Will is about having a personality, knowing 100% sure what it is that you want, and not giving up until you get it, as well as never be influenced by others again. You must be in full control of yourself.
3)The Third Pillar is called “Energy”. This is the fuel that is going to feed your body, mind and spirit. Without this pillar, everything would fall apart.
We need to look in to several areas that influence your energy such as nutrition, exercise, sexual activities, among others.
4) The Fourth Pillar is called “Projection”, we are going to learn about how you can feel better what you are projecting to the outside world and how to feel what others are projecting so you can take the appropriate actions.
For example: I’m sure that you have one friend that you feel good when you’re with him/her, better than other friends; some people just make you feel better than others. Then you have those “friends” that totally drain you out of your energy.
You’ll develop this sensitivity as well as knowing what you project and how to change it.
This Fourth Pillar also deals with improving your senses to far beyond what you can ever expect so you will be able to feel everything in your life much more intensely than before.
Although most of the famous charismatic people distinguish themselves over one area of those pillars, it’s rare that one person has all four well developed.
For example, charismatic religious leaders like Pope John Paul II or the Dalai Lama, reside on Pillar One, INNER POWER. Charismatic dictators like Hitler, Mussolini or Stalin, the main area is the Pillar Two; they have an IRON WILL. Athletes like Michael Jordan, David Beckham live mainly on Pillar Three, ENERGY. Music performers like Jim Morrison, Madonna, Robbie Williams and actresses that rely on their sex appeal like Marilyn Monroe or Elizabeth Hurley live on Pillar Four, PROJECTION.
All of them developed one of those Pillars to very high levels but that doesn’t mean that all the other pillars have ZERO value for them. If it were, most likely they wouldn’t be charismatic. So, although they have very high values in one pillar, they also have at least one more with a somewhat high value.
Still, it’s better to have medium levels in all Four Pillars than a very high value on one Pillar and low on the rest. Consistency is the key.
It’s rare to find someone that has high levels on all Four Pillars, when you find someone like that, it’s one in a million. You could be least sensitive person in the world but you can literally feel this person entering a room. It’s one of those people that have the “turnaround effect” in others: people just turn around because they feel his presence. It’s a level way beyond charisma; the magnetism is so great that it becomes a complete fascination effect where others just want to be around this person. Perhaps you’ve had the privilege to meet someone like this. This is what you have the potential to become if you follow through the Charisma School framework.
If, for instance, you just focus on the exercises of one of the pillars, or just do a few exercises and not all, you would have some results inevitability. Although I wouldn’t recommend this approach, since you wouldn’t have the same amazing results promised by this school.
You may be asking:
“Why do I need all this work? All the charismatic people I know didn’t need any of that”
And you would be completely right in asking that. Most likely, the majority of the charismatic people didn’t need a charisma course (albeit some of them did have image consultants), that’s why they already had the necessary subconscious requirements for being charismatic since birth or they turned charismatic due to the events in their lives that allowed them to become famous.
If you can influence the emotions of thousands of people and get them cheering your name, like Jim Morrison, Madonna or Robbie Williams, you would most likely become a pretty charismatic person yourself. But back to reality, it will be unlikely you’ll get this during your lifetime. Don’t take this the wrong way, I don’t want to put any limits on your dreams, but just take it that the average person will never (or has the ambition) to be this kind of public performer. So, we have to find ways to get the same effect that those events would have on you.
Also, by developing all four Pillars of Charisma, you will, not only develop charisma, but also lead a genuinely happy life with all the associated benefits from the “IT” factor.