How to Develop Charisma
The text below is taken from the Wikipedia page on “charisma”:
The following are Professor Wiseman’s general tips on how to be more charismatic:
• General: Open body posture, hands away from face when talking, stand up straight, relax, hands apart with palms forwards or upwards;
• To an individual: Let people know they matter and you enjoy being around them, develop a genuine smile, nod when they talk, briefly touch them on the upper arm, and maintain eye contact;
• To a group: Be comfortable as a leader, move around to appear enthusiastic, lean slightly forward and look at all parts of the group;
• Message: Move beyond the status quo and make a difference, be controversial, new, simple to understand, and counter-intuitive;
• Speech: Be clear, fluent, forceful, and articulate, evoke imagery, use an upbeat tempo, occasionally slow for tension or emphasis;
These are the tips you can expect from the current books on improving your charisma. But, as you can see for yourself, what the researcher Richard Wiseman did, was to take the external aspects of charisma and distill it into a set of behaviors that, if followed, will make anyone charismatic.
Can you spot the mistake in this?
That’s right, just like most books on “charisma” development, it only focuses on the EXTERNAL aspects, but as we’ve seen, charisma is a “spiritual quality,” a “personal quality,” something that you radiate from the INSIDE; so how can you be charismatic if you only focus on the external cues?
“Fake it till you make it” doesn’t apply here since charisma radiates from the INSIDE to the OUTSIDE, not the other way around. So you can fake a lot of things… but not charisma.
Then how can we develop charisma?
In our school, charisma is much more than just “standing out”; it’s a LIFE SYSTEM that stands out from the crowd as a side effect. That means you will develop that “personal quality” and create a better way of living at all levels of your development as a human.
You need to consider this personal evolution as essential for being charismatic.
If personal evolution is not a part of charisma, you’ll only end up with an unbalanced life. Furthermore, charisma will only inebriate you with an illusion of true spiritual power, making you prone to depression and/or self-destructive behavior when you confront your underdeveloped self.
When you achieve this great power of your personality, other parts of you MUST evolve as well to allow your whole being to grow and become balanced.
We divide the parts necessary for developing charisma into four distinct Pillars: Inner Power, Will, Energy, and Projection.
Our school explains charisma as a holistic system, so it cannot be explained by any parts alone, only by the whole. We understand charisma as the sum of all Four Pillars, be it that neither can work independently.
Here’s a graphical representation for better understanding:
1) The First Pillar is called “Inner Power,” and its goal is to integrate the mind, body, and spirit into a functional whole and develop that “spiritual quality” inside of you. In our materialistic society, we often leave a lot of past scars unhealed; these scars are marks in our spirit that create a lot of barriers in ourselves. When you are full of these blocks, your charisma will suffer.
Remember, no bad emotion should stay with you as a charismatic person. Fear must be faced, as well as other negative emotions. This Pillar can develop your self-confidence, assertiveness, and self-esteem.
You’ll also develop your spiritual energy on this Pillar.
By integrating all mind, body, and spirit, the goal is to become an authentic person faithful to your principles.
2) The Second Pillar is called “Will.” If I could say one thing missing from most individuals, this would be the one. In short, the Will is about having a personality, knowing 100% sure what you want, not giving up until you get it, and never be influenced by others again. You must be in complete control of yourself.
3)The Third Pillar is called “Energy.” This is the fuel that is going to feed your body, mind, and spirit. Without this Pillar, everything would fall apart.
We need to look into several areas that influence your energy, such as nutrition, exercise, and sexual activities, among others.
4) The Fourth Pillar is called “Projection” we are going to learn about how you can feel better what you are projecting to the outside world and how to feel what others are projecting so you can take the appropriate actions.
For example, I’m sure you have one friend you feel good with when you’re with him/her, better than other friends; some people make you feel better than others. Then you have those “friends” that drain you of your energy.
You’ll develop this sensitivity and know what you project and how to change it.
This Fourth Pillar also deals with improving your senses too far beyond what you can ever expect so you can feel everything in your life much more intensely than before.
Although most famous charismatic people distinguish themselves over one area of those pillars, one person rarely has all four well-developed.
For example, charismatic religious leaders like Pope John Paul II or the Dalai Lama reside on Pillar One, INNER POWER. The main area for charismatic dictators like Hitler, Mussolini, or Stalin is Pillar Two; they have an IRON WILL. Athletes like Michael Jordan and David Beckham live mainly on Pillar Three, ENERGY. Music performers like Jim Morrison, Madonna, and Robbie Williams, and actresses that rely on their sex appeals, like Marilyn Monroe or Elizabeth Hurley, live on Pillar Four, PROJECTION.
All of them developed one of those Pillars to very high levels, but that doesn’t mean that all the other pillars have ZERO value for them. If it were, most likely, they wouldn’t be charismatic. So, although they have very high importance in one Pillar, they also have at least one more with a somewhat high value.
Still, it’s better to have medium levels in all Four Pillars than a very high value on one Pillar and low on the rest. Consistency is the key.
It’s rare to find someone with high levels on all Four Pillars; when you see someone like that, it’s one in a million. You could be the least sensitive person in the world, but you can feel this person entering a room. It’s one of those people that have the “turnaround effect” in others: people turn around because they feel his presence. It’s a level way beyond charisma; the magnetism is so great that it becomes a complete fascination where others want to be around this person. Perhaps you’ve had the privilege to meet someone like this. This is what you have the potential to become if you follow through with the Charisma School framework.
If, for instance, you focus on the exercises of one of the pillars or just do a few exercises and not all, you will have some results inevitability. However, I wouldn’t recommend this approach, since you wouldn’t have the same remarkable results promised by this school.
You may be asking:
“Why do I need all this work? All the charismatic people I know didn’t need any of that.”
And you would be entirely correct in asking that. Most likely, the majority of charismatic people didn’t need a charisma course (albeit some of them did have image consultants), that’s why they already had the necessary subconscious requirements for being charismatic since birth, or they turned charismatic due to the events in their lives that allowed them to become famous.
If you can influence thousands of people’s emotions and get them to cheer your name, like Jim Morrison, Madonna, or Robbie Williams, you would most likely become a pretty charismatic person. But back to reality, it’s unlikely most people will achieve that. The average person will never (or has the ambition) to be this kind of public performer. So, we must find ways to get the same effect those events would have on you.
Also, by developing all four Pillars of Charisma, you will build charisma and lead a genuinely happy life with all the associated benefits from the “IT” factor.