How to improve your self-reliance

Self-reliance is essential, not just in magnetism and charisma, but also to thrive in life.

This is nothing more than relying on your power and ability to do what you need to do.

And the way to develop it is simple: doing what you said you were going to do, when you were going to do it, and how you were going to do it.

Basically, following through on your word.

That’s it.

Do it every day, and you’ll see your self-reliance exponentially improving. You may come across some challenges as you do it:

The most common one is being over-ambitious as you start, which leads to failure. As in: “From now on, I’m going to the gym daily.” This can be hard to sustain long-term, where sickness or holidays could side-track you.

It’s much better to start doing them in shorter and more controlled periods, like a month, a week, or even just a few days. And then decide what you want to do after. Establishing your intentions forever is setting yourself up for failure.

The second most common challenge is when you fail. It’s easy to enter a downward spiral of self-blaming and depression: “I’m always like this,” “I’m constantly making the same mistakes,” and so forth.

That’s not the goal. You will fail, no question about it. It’s about learning what you can and continue your path. Why have you failed? Was it something within your control or not? Maybe you couldn’t complete your one week of daily jogging because you got sick. There is not much you could control here. But if you couldn’t finish it because you always oversleep in the morning, the morning may not be the best time for your daily jogging, and you could change the time.

The goal is not self-blaming but learning from it, adapting, and moving on. As long as you want to accomplish what you set out to do, you’ll find a way.

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